Why Do I Stress?
I guess I stress because I have nothing better to do with my time. If my life was jam packed with activies, chores and what-not I guess I wouldn't have to time to stress. But I hate being busy. Lazy is my middle name. You didn't know that did ya? I like going home, eating and watching TV all night. Maybe do a little laundry. Pull some weeds. Shoot. I never like pulling weeds. They are on my mind because I have many to pull.
We are having people over this weekend for my birthday. I know these people care more about seeing me than seeing that I have dead flowers in pots by my door. Or the 10 zillion weeds in my front yard. Really, are they going to care that there are nose prints in my windows, spots on my floor, strange animal smells? Ok, that last one is just gross. Note to self, buy lots of candles! Candles and booze. I figure the only way I won't stress about this stuff is to drink heavily all week and be sufficiently tanked by the time everyone arrives on Saturday. That should do the trick. ha! Yea, that's the ticket.
I'm not going to run myself ragged trying to create the perfect home. Or the illusion of a perfect one. I'm not perfect and I don't live that way. I'm me. I live in a house full of cat hair. There are dog toys EVERYWHERE. And socks. They multiply like the weeds. Yes, I clean. I think the cat hair sees the Lysol and jumps up to the ceiling while I'm cleaning and then as soon as I leave the room, it floats back down to where it had been resting. We have a lot of junk. And it pretty much is all out in the open so we don't lose it. So sue me. If you can't sit and eat next to a motorcycle helmet on the table, I don't know what to tell ya.
You know what? If you want to come by Saturday, I will be the heavily medicated one in the back sipping margaritas eating a hamburger. I promise they will both be hair free. You'll have a lovely view of the new grass or nose print windows depending upon where you are sitting. If you are lucky, maybe there will be a little face attached to that nose.
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