Autumn's Beloved
The day we brought Autumn home for the hospital after she was born, there were two new friends waiting for us. A huge christmas bear and this large scary doll. My mom and step dad had bought these for Autumn, very sweet. I held onto them for Autumn, even though that doll kind of freaked me out. I'd remembered seeing these kind of dolls, hanging by a hook in their head at Toys R Us. Staring blankly. Always staring. haha
Fast forward to an older Autumn, 2 or 3 and talking. She formed an important bond with this friend and told me her name was Mama Doll. She thought in her crazy little 2 or 3 yeard old mind that this doll looked an awful lot like her Ma. Yes, my secret is out, I like to wear bonnetts and dress like Holly Hobby. Autumn took Mama Doll everywhere, always on sleep overs. It gave her comfort, to have a part of me with her when she was away from home. She would cry if Mama Doll had been forgotten at home. She continued to take Mama Doll with her on sleep overs with friends until a couple of years ago. I was a little worried someone would make fun of this worn out doll accompanying her. Plus, after years of washing, she wasn't holding up so good anymore. I told her we need to take care of Mama Doll in her golden years and keep her safe at home. She now finds another small comfort from home to bring to friends houses.
Mama Doll is still with us and on Autumn's bed. Just last night, she was gently tucked under Autumn's head as if she'd fallen asleep in Mama Doll's lap. She still make the occasional trip to Grandmas for a visit. She's been a comfort to Autumn and to me, thinking that somehow a piece of me is with her when she's away from me. I know I will feel truly kicked to the curb when Autumn doesn't need Mama Doll anymore. Like in Toy Story 2, remember Jessie's story of the little girl who used to love her then put her in the box and left her for dead on the side of the road? That scene actually brought a tear to my eye. Ok, I'm a sensitive sap. So the hell what.
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