About Me

Name: Autumn's Mom

Location: Northern California, United States

Hey. I see you there. Thanks for the visit, hope I'll be seeing you again soon.

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Sunday, April 30, 2006

Spring Clean-Up It was spring clean-up at our house this weekend. M completely cleaned out the garage and put together some new cool shelves so we can store mega MEGA rolls of Charmin. Autumn cleaned her room. I cleaned the kitchen. My bedroom is still a complete mess but whatever. It ain't going anywhere. Here is a pic of Joey helping me with the laundry. Apparently, there is no better place to nap than a big warm pile of freshly laundered clothes. If I didn't have to go pick up Autumn, I would have crawled right in there with him. We've also started crate training Minnie the Shit Machine, also known as Minnie the "I can do a great Linda Blair impression from The Exorcist"! After drinking a too big drink of water, whe will come right up to you and projectile on your feet. Cute, right? Yeah, I don't think so either. Anyway, so we got her a crate. This is how it's going.. That's right, it's a cat. Lil LOVES the crate. She spent pretty much the entire day in it. Here is a pic of Minnie sleeping right outside the crate. All in all, I think it's going pretty well so far. What do you think? posted by Autumn's Mom at 9:29 PM - 4 WTF!

 

Thursday, April 27, 2006

Thursday 13 I almost forgot about Thursday 13! Well, I've only done it once. But I thought it was kind of fun. I hope you did too. Thirteen Things I Love About Spring!!! 1) Purple Tulips 2) Purple Lilacs (ok, there is a bouquet on my desk here) 3) Watching the sun turn my ghostly white arms a pale sorta pink 4) Capris 5) Wearing flip flops or just plain bare feat 6) Pedicured Toes (I got my first pedi of the season, they are pink & sparkly) 7) Riding in my car with the sun roof open 8) The smell of fresh cut grass 9) Claritin & Nasorel!!!! 10) Kids softball games 11) Seeing my daughter wear shorts & cute skirts 12) Colts (there is a horse farm down the road from us) 13) Spring Cleaning! Clear out the old crap and make room for the new!!! posted by Autumn's Mom at 11:55 AM - 3 WTF!

 

Wednesday, April 26, 2006

It's Not Thursday?? Don't you hate when you think it's a day ahead of reality? Now I'm gonna have two Thursday's this week. I'm too tired for two Thursdays. What are you gonna do? American Idol update. Chris is gonna win and he's hot. Like my artsy fartsy picture? I wish I had an actual camera, it would have come out better. I predict the Pickler is going home this week. She has done the best she can and just isn't getting any better. M still thinks Paris is gonna win. I predict she'll be gone in another week. In other news, yes there is news other than AI, I joined weight watchers last night. I have a goal that I think is obtainable. It'll make a dent. hahaha I thought about downloading one of those tickers to be on top of my blog, ticking off the weight. I don't know if I can handle the pressure of a ticker. I'll have to think on it. How's the dog, you ask? She's still shitting. Her breath F'ing reeks. But she's cute as hell. The kid is teaching her to shake paws. I imagine Minnie one day NOT barking at strangers in the house but instead walking up to them politely and shaking a paw. Of course later she will shit in their shoes, but that is what shit machines do! Lastly, my husband is a complete idiot. He hates when I write about him on my blog. He'll do something stupid and say, "Don't write about this!" Yesterday, I couldn't find my keys. I have a spare that I grab in the morning, thinking I'll find the real ones sometime later. He freaks out and wants to look for them. Ok, go ahead. I could use the help since it's been 24 hours and I still don't know where they are. He finds them and jingles them for my attention. "You need to put these in a safe place." I hate being talked to like a child. I hate losing my keys like a child too, but I can talk down to my own damn self. So I say to him, "Why don't you put them up your butt then?" Seems safe to me. I WAS SO JOKING. I'm not even going to say it, you know what he did. Dude, I have to touch those every fucking day. Get them out of your butt!!! I married an idiot. If I made T-Shirts (Add this one to the list, Liz) Yesterday mine would have said, "Hi I'm Dot. I married an Idiot!" I had to bury that set of keys along with M's sorry, dead ass in the backyard. R.I.P. M posted by Autumn's Mom at 10:07 AM - 9 WTF!

 

Tuesday, April 25, 2006

Tuesday Work Blues I'm up to my eyeballs in Sales Tax Returns and Ass Repairmen today. Yes, he's back. AGAIN. And this time he brought a little Mini-Me Ass Repairman with him. The Mini-Me was a lot nicer. Anyway, back to regularly scheduled programming soon. posted by Autumn's Mom at 9:56 AM - 2 WTF!

 

Monday, April 24, 2006

The Weekend We had a pretty nice weekend! The weather was good. We had company over. We shopped. We laughed, we cried...ok, no one cried. Except maybe my nephew when we told him to go outside. hahaha I bought the kids a hover disc to toss around and told them to go play outside. That lasted all of 5 minutes. Kids these days! I used to leave at 8 AM and stay out til dark. My kid hardly ever leaves the house. Not that I'm really complaining, cuz I'm a worry wart when she's out on her own. Although, last Friday, I dropped her off at our neighborhood baseball park so she could watch her friends game. Friend was pitching, it was a very big deal. She was at the park from 7:30 til 10:00 PM. Yes, you read that right. There were at 5 parents I could think of that I know there. (there were probably more). She had her phone with her and she was with another friend. This is the beauty of living in our small town, for me. She got a little taste of freedom, and I had a quiet Friday night watching Walk the Line with M. Saturday we invited my sister in law and family over. My father in law came over. (Hi Papa Rod!) It was a lovely day. SIL, PIL and I went shopping at the outlets. Have you noticed that Gas isn't the only price rising around here? The outlets aren't what they used to be. I saw a LOT of full price items out there. Still, this didn't put a damper on my shopping spirit! I got the kid a cute pair of Roxy board shorts which she is wearing this fine cloudy morning. I got a cute outside plant holder, a cookie sheet and a couple of shirts. Oh, and to my favorite store where I likes to buy my shirts…Could you please hire employees who can see and do simple math? I stood in line for an eternity to pay for two shirts that didn’t even come to $20. I actually watched the woman age before my eyes, I was there so long. She was squinting so hard to read the little numbers on her customer’ credit card, that I watched the wrinkles on her face deepen. She was a brunette when I walked in and I swear to you she was completely grey when I left. She was all hunched over with a cane, ( ok, you get the picture right?) it took forever. No, I don’t need to hear about your special on jeans, just the shirts please. I don’t want to give you my email address so you can send me coupons, just give me my change. You can’t figure it out, can you? Whatever, keep it. I’ve really got to go! After mowing down at least three different cars who thought it was a great idea to just sit in the middle of the road while they decided WTF they were doing, we made it home in time for dinner. We had yummy Tri-Tip and well I don’t remember what else, cuz it’s all about the Tri-Tip baby. Mm mm good. Sunday was very lazy for me. I basically did NOTHING. My husband, washed and detailed my car. Let me say that again. HE WASHED AND DETAILED MY CAR. Just. Because. Don’t know what I did to deserve that, but I’d better keep it up!! He and the kid put together her new nightstand. She ended up doing most of the work. At 9:00 last night I poked my head into her room and she had the stand together and was installing the brackets that hold the drawers. She had her head all the way inside the thing with a little flashlight held in place for her to see. I really need to get a new camera y’all because the sight was priceless. That’s it in a nutshell. Oh, and I paid the kid $5 to pick up all the dog poop and stray leaves. I thank my Lord everyday that he gave me someone to do my shit work for me. posted by Autumn's Mom at 8:58 AM - 3 WTF!

 

Friday, April 21, 2006

And now we join the Ass Repairman Tales already in progress Ass Repairman, "I can't find the line." Us, "Really. Can't find it huh?" Ass Repairman grumbles and mumbles back and forth from the attic. Ass Repairman, "We've got problems. I got nothin." Us (muffled laughter), "Ya don't say?" Which is why we've also called another phone company to HOOK US UP. Ass Repairman, "The problem is I need to get a line from Here to THERE." Us, "Here to there, sounds complicated. Can you handle it Ass Repairman." This was followed by complete silence. Ass Repairman quotes are REAL people. This is what goes on out in the sticks. I know you were wondering, wonder no more. posted by Autumn's Mom at 4:28 PM - 3 WTF!

OCD Anyone who knows my kid knows that she has a bit of a "picking" problem. She picks at her scabs like a boy. Like her father. She'll turn a tiny cat scratch into a nickle sized circle in about 3 days. She has some good ones on her legs and a couple on her belly. I took her to the Dr. last year and the woman said, "yeah, she probably has a little OCD." The Dr. suggested covering the soars with bandaids and tape. Which is kind of dumb. It's just as easy to pick bandaids and tape as it is to pick at a scab, but whatever. Picking hit it's peek when puberty came to town. Puberty kind of hit Autumn like a ton of bricks. She wore sweatshirts all last summer because she didn't want anyone to know she had breasts. Or scabs. She refused to talk about her feelings or anything she's going through. So, I have backed off. Talking would turn into fighting which turned into picking. It's not worth a battle. I had hoped we'd be able to talk about this stuff, like my mom and I never could. Ha! I bought her this book cuz I know she's got questions but maybe she'd rather read about them than discuss them with her mother who's never been 11. I know she's looked at it. She says it's evil, which translates to it's interesting and I like it. Boys are evil too. She's a pretty resiliant kid. She's growing and changing and accepting her fate. She will someday become a woman. Her own woman. A woman who lives with OCD. The other day on the way home she asked me, "Mom, what's OCD." Me, "Obsessive Compulsive Disorder." Her, "And I have it?" Me, "Yes you do." Her, "Cool! I have a disease!!" Knowing is half the battle right? That's my girl! posted by Autumn's Mom at 11:06 AM - 5 WTF!

 

Thursday, April 20, 2006

Thursday 13 For my first Thursday 13, I shall list 13 random songs I am currently listening to in my car. 1) Cry Me a River - Justin Timberlake 2) More Than a Woman - The Bee Gees 3) Beautiful Disaster - Kelly Clarkson 4) Sara Smile - Hall & Oats 5) So Into You - Altlana Rythem Section 6) It's Been Awhile - Staind 7) You're Beautiful - James Blunt 8) Summer Breeze - Seals & Croft 9) You'll Think of Me - Keith Urban 10) Lady - Little River Band 11) Errtime - Nelly 12) The Things We do for Love - 10cc 13) Jesus Take the Wheel - Carrie Underwood posted by Autumn's Mom at 1:29 PM - 5 WTF!

 

Tuesday, April 18, 2006

VOTE FOR ELLIOT Let me start this by saying, every week I ask my husband who's gonna win American Idol. He really doesn't give a rats ass, but he plays along. Anyway, I ask him, "Dear (I startle him cuz he's not paying attention), who's gonna win American Idol?" M says, "Who is gonna win American Idol? Paris. Paris is gonna win." He's so cute. I've jumped on the underdog bandwagon and voted for Elliot tonight. I'm just not ready to see him go yet. I like his story. He seems like a geuine guy to me. I'm sure he'd sit and have a drink with us in a bar one night. Would Chris??? Prolly not. But he's still HOT tho. (maybe not in this picture. But take my word for it.) As a random side note. While watching AI tonight, there is a commercial we see often about kids not smoking pot. You know the one where the boy is mumbling because his fist is stuck in his mouth because he does everything his friends tell him to? Like smoking pot? Autumn pipes up, I can do that. If she doesn't make it into college, there is always the circus. Or one of those pot commercials. posted by Autumn's Mom at 8:39 PM - 4 WTF!

Actual Phone Call You know those warm, fuzzy commercials about actual OnStar phone calls? Yeah, this isn't one of those. Ass Repairman, "Someone called yesterday, her phone isn't working?" Me, "yeah, it's dead." Ass, "Is it dead?" Me, "Yes, it's dead. We tried another phone on her line and it doesn't work. We plugged her phone into another line outside her office and the phone worked. I think it's the line." Ass, "Is it the line or the phone??" Me, "Is there an echo? I said we think it's the line. We really need you to come figure it out Ass Repairman." Ass, "Did you try the other jack in her office? Did you move her furniture? Did you stand on your head and count to 100? That works sometimes. Did you did you did you did you????" Me, "Your job ASS not mine. You coming out or what?" Ass, "We (there is no we, there is only the Ass) can't get out there til Thursday or Friday at the earliest." Me, "FUCK. Ok, well we'll be here." I hang up and shout, "IT'S DEAD. GEEZ. IT'S DEAD DEAD DEAD." Boss is on the floor laughing and thanking me for talking to the Ass Repairman. I don't get paid enough for this crap. posted by Autumn's Mom at 8:53 AM - 1 WTF!

 

Monday, April 17, 2006

Let There Be Light The sun is back. I hope it's here to stay. I don't want to jinx it though. So, that's it. I'm shutting up. Yay!!!!! posted by Autumn's Mom at 8:28 AM - 3 WTF!

 

Saturday, April 15, 2006

HAPPY EASTER posted by Autumn's Mom at 10:42 PM - 1 WTF!

 

Friday, April 14, 2006

Jump Back Someone told me their husband checks in on Fridays for a little FLASHBACK!! Well here you go! Top Ten Albums for 4/20/1991 1. Mariah Carey / Mariah Carey (you had it. C'mon) 2. Gonna Make You Sweat / C+C Music Factory (Sure did!) 3. Wilson Phillips / Wilson Phillips 4. Out of Time / R.E.M. (Are you Shiny Happy People??) 5. Shake Your Money Maker / The Black Crowes (She talks to Angels...Love it) 6. I'm Your Baby Tonight / Whitney Houston (Pre-Crack) 7. Heart Shaped World / Chris Isaak (Who doesn't love Wicked Game??) 8. The Doors / Soundtrack 9. MCMXC A.D. / Enigma (??????) 10. The Soul Cages / Sting (don't remember this one) Have a Good Good Friday everybody! posted by Autumn's Mom at 11:23 AM - 2 WTF!

 

Thursday, April 13, 2006

Baby No More Yesterday, the last part of my daughter that was still a baby was ripped from her mouth. She had a dentist appointment and they helped her wiggle out her last two baby teeth. Wiggle out are there words, not mine and it helped ease her mind that this wasn't going to be the painful experience she thought it was going to be. I always tell her that her imagination is usually worse than the reality of the situation. I'm her mother, what the hell is she going to listen to me for??? My baby is no longer a baby. There is not one piece of physical evidence of babyness left in her. She was never a chubby baby. Whatever baby fat there ever was is now long gone. Her fluffy cute light blond hair is now thick dark straw I could choke her with. She'll be shaving and plucking before I can say Stop Right There Missy!! The whining is all that is left. Once that's gone..wait...this is my child we are talking about. The whining will NEVER be gone!!! I can hold to that at least. What a relief. My beautiful baby is now a beautiful, willful, independent, smart-ASS adolescent. Woo hoo. Yay me. I'd post a picture of this beautiful creature for you to behold, but she broke my camera and hasn't bothered to replace it. Geez. Get a job already, Autumn! I'm kidding. About her getting a job, she really did break my camera. Besides, it creeps me out the thought of some nasty fuck accidentally stumbling into my site with his/her hands down his/her pants eyeing my kid. If you are a perve Go. Away. Nothing for you here. Shooooo! posted by Autumn's Mom at 9:14 AM - 4 WTF!

 

Wednesday, April 12, 2006

6 Weird Things About Me Hmmm I've been pondering this all morning. I'm sure other people (you know who you are) can easily think of 6 Hundred weird things about me. But still I sit here pondering when I should be working! Anyway, here goes... 1) On my right arm I have seven freckles that are shaped exactly like the Big Dipper. That's a little freaky weird. I used to think that it was a marking of my true people who are searching the galaxy for me as we speak. 2) I can watch movies over and over and over again and never get tired of them. I think of the characters as old friends I like to spend time. I know, I need to get a real life. 3) I am 3/4's Spanish but cannot speak or understand the language. 4) Bad smells, talking about bad smells, runny snot hanging out of a baby's nose and porta-pottys all make me gag. I have the worst gag reflex. I will dry heave and have tears streaming down my face if I have to deal with anything smelly or too boogery. Ack. NEXT 5) I really think I should have been born a few decades ago. I really want to be a 50's housewife not a modern working woman of today. I want to wear cute little aprons while I clean and bake. I have no desire to work or be the bread winner. I wish I had kids named Chip and Betty. 6) I don't like melted cheese. Geez, what a BORING list. But there it is. posted by Autumn's Mom at 1:05 PM - 5 WTF!

 

Tuesday, April 11, 2006

Chris Did Not Bring It But Elliot sure did. Chris sang a song I'd never even heard of. Innuendo??? The members of Queen said they'd never performed the song live. I don't know dawg, I'm not feelin it. I read another blog that said he got the flashing lights again this week, but he didn't deserve them. I'm gonna have to agree. I hate to say it. Simon commented that it Chris could have had a moment tonight. He could have , but he didn't. That left the door wide open for Elliot. He was dead on singing Somebody to Love. Love the song and loved his performance. He may be in til the end. Wanna Bet Line??? I still pick Chris to win. But he did not impress me this week. He is Hot tho. I also liked the Pickler. She sang Bohemian Rhapsody. She came out in this crazy dominatrix outfit and stilleto boots. I was uneasy watching her work the stage. I kept expecting her to fall and crack her skull. But she was fun and I like her singing. Paris was also really hot. I think we got a glimpse of the grown up Paris. She's still a kid and I don't think she's ready to be an American Idol. My husband says she's the only one who can really sing and she's going to win. Doubtful. It makes me laugh that he'd even care or have a thought about who's gonna win this show. He's not a fan. He sits threw the whole thing reading a book and making fun of me when I take pictures of my TV for this blog. Taylor. Taylor. Taylor. We saw the old Taylor tonight. He was possessed out there! He's fun and I'd pay to see him in a smokey blues bar. He sang Crazy Little Thing Called Love. This song is a fond memory for me as I owned it on Vinyl!! He tried to "kick" it into high gear by kicking the mic stand and MISSED. That was freakin HIlarious. He's fun to watch. My bottom three are Ace, Bucky and ??? I'm not sure. Katharine??? Yeah. That's my three. I'll let you know. posted by Autumn's Mom at 9:32 PM - 4 WTF!

Idol Tonight, ALLRIGHT! Get out your Jack and Coke, American Idol is on tonight! The theme this week is songs by the band Queen. If you are a hardcore Queen fan, you may want to do a few shots before viewing. hahaha I think this is the week that Bucky and his Leanne Rhimes hair are DONE! He's nice and all, but he's just not AI material. I think Ace may be safe one more week, but he's the next to go. To the fans, yes, I will be posting a new pic of Chris tomorrow. I'll be watching on sister in law's flat screen. I'm sure he'll be lookin Muoy Delicioso. Paula says, stay tuned! And by tuned, she means drunk! posted by Autumn's Mom at 11:09 AM - 1 WTF!

 

Sunday, April 09, 2006

Battlestar Galactica "There are those who believe... that life here... began out there. Far across the universe. With tribes of humans... who may have been the forefathers of the Egyptians... or the Toltecs... or the Mayans... that they may have been the architects of the Great Pyramids... or the lost civilizations of Lemuria... or Atlantis... Some believe that there may yet be brothers of man... who even now fight to survive... somewhere beyond the heavens." I was eight when the original series, Battlestar Galatica, was on. Movies like Star Wars and Close Encounters of the Third Kind had already come out. I was fascinated with space. I really believed that by the year 2000, we'd all be flying around like Judy Jetson. That was the future. Little did I know, my future would have me riding around in a Toyota Camry. Oh well. I thought I'd catch a show a friend enjoys, since I seem to bully them into watching American Idol a lot. So I got the new Battlestar Galatica The Miniseries on Netflix. I have to say, it's alright. It's campy and has the same mediocre acting the original had. The new series has a few character twists. The Cylons are more modern looking. They don't look like burly men in space suits anymore, they actually looked like machines. There is a new breed of Cylon. A female prototype, who is beautiful, thin and seems to be fascinated various aspects of human life. Oh, and she's a nymphomaniac. I mean of COURSE she is. This IS the Sci-Fi Network we are talking about. Catering to men ages 10 to 80. haha Starbuck was my favorite character. He was cute. His hobbies were gambling, cigars, hookers and kicking ass in space. In the updated version, he is a woman. Still smoking cigars, but she definitely appears to have a thing for Apollo. Ok, change is good. But I don't know if I can handle Starbuck and Apollo "doing it". ack Lt. Boomer was a young black man in the original, she is now young asian woman. Little bit of trivia here. Does anyone remember who played Apollo's younger brother? He was only in about the first 15 or 20 minutes or so. Can you guess? It was non other than Ricky Springfield! And yes, his lips looked moist. How did he do that??? Lip Smacker? Adama is still crusty and old. The president in the updated show is female. Now that, is cool. It's the future people. Get on board. All in all I give it a thumb up. I've only watched the miniseries so far. I think I'll be checking out the TV series as well. Then we can dish J. :) Now I know what you're thinking, Line. I'm not any nerdier than that dude you sleep next too. GET ON BOARD. Dot jumping to light speed. Out. posted by Autumn's Mom at 3:29 PM - 7 WTF!

My Cat Joey For those of you who don't know, my cat Joey (Tribianni) is the little guy peeking from behind the curtan in my profile picture. It's probably the best picture I've ever taken. Perfectly capturing half of his face. I've had him for almost three years. (He was a birthday present.) He is the coolest cat I've ever had. He fetches, he has a beautiful purry voice, he doesn't like to sit on me my but will sit above my head on the back of the couch. Perfect for me, cuz I don't like to feel crowded. When he can't find me he calls out and it likes he saying "Mamaaaa??" Here are some other pictures of my little furry buddy. "How you Doin" "Look into my eyes. You will give me CHICKEN!" "Captain Joey and his faithful sidekick Stinky Girl. posted by Autumn's Mom at 1:03 AM - 3 WTF!

 

Friday, April 07, 2006

I Knew Having a Dog Would Suck Ass Thanks for telling me. She's just a puppy. I know. I need to train her, work with her. I know, I KNOW. My daughter needs to be sure and pick her crap off the floor so Minnie doesn't eat it. Yeah, she knows, but she doesn't give a fuck. This destructive behavior started getting on my nerves yesterday when I came home at lunch and found she'd dug a hole in the dirt of a potted plant by the door. Chewed up one of my favorite flip flops and the puppy wee wee training pads. I hadn't crate trained her for two reasons. One, she wasn't crate trained when I got her and she's almost 9 months old. Two, she's so small and looked at me with these huge eyeballs that said, "I'll be good. Just leave me in the livingroom. I'll sleep on my bed all day and only chew on the cats my bone. Oh, and could you leave the TV on so I don't feel so alone?" Yea, I'm a sucker. Underneather my bangs, it's stamped right there on my forehead. This is why I wear bangs. This morning we were met in the hall way by a poo poo platter of a pencil, I think, a lip smackers, orange flavored, Homer Simpson's head etc. Yes, this did make her sick. Thanks for asking. I yelled. I told M to call and send her back. I can't take it anymore!!! Then I got in the shower and started thinking how this was really my fault. (you can see now how I feel about everything my kid does which is why having a dog sucks ASS!!!! I have enough guilt) I Told M to forget what I said. I'll work with her. He said yeah, I wasnt' going to call. He knows me. He knows I would have taken it out on him that my poor little baby was going back to the puppy farm! I've decided that during the day, I'm keeping her in the kitchen on the tile. She's pee and poo to her hearts content and it's easier to clean up. I am still trying to get her to use the puppy pads. I also need to keep her out of Autumn's room at night when ever possible. When the brat is asleep, I need to just shut her door. Or I could use the baby gate to keep her in my bedroom. Because I can clean up my floor. I give a fuck. I need to take a lot more deep breaths. Oh, and I'm getting her a muzzle so she doesn't chew on the cats. Just to train her. Not to muzzler her forever. She's been snappy. The cats are pretty good with her. They just want to sniff her butt. duh. I have a plan and it's time to execute it. Or else, I am going to live on the puppy farm! posted by Autumn's Mom at 9:45 AM - 5 WTF!

 

Thursday, April 06, 2006

Scary Moment I'm sitting at work, it's 9:19. We are listening to the Awesome 80's on XM. I'm typing and singing along to... I’ll be loving you I’ll be (I’ll be loving you) Loving you (the things you do) Yeah, it’s forever (I’ll be loving you) I’ll be (I’ll be loving you) Loving you, yeah In the middle of the song I wonder who sings this. It's so familiar. So I look it up on MSN. It's freakin New Kids on the Block. Even before they became NKOTB. Ok, they weren't cool then either. I can't believe I know the words to a new kids song. I was waaaaaaay to old for them when they came out. Of course now... Whoo I need to shake that off. How about some Def Leppard, Hysteria! Now THAT I can sink my teeth into. My neighbor mentioned that Def Leppard and Journey are touring this year. I told my spouse I wanna go. We'll see. He's not much of a concert going kind of guy. I'm sure I can guilt him into it though. posted by Autumn's Mom at 9:20 AM - 6 WTF!

 

Wednesday, April 05, 2006

Kissing Chris Tracy, funny you should mention kissing Chris tonight. He blew me one last night. Did you see? Did you see? NO, well that's because it was just for me. But I'm gonna share the pic with you all now. Even my fingers are giggling right now. Makes my heart melt! Don't be jealous. You'll all find YOUR american idol. This one is alllll mine. Ok, seriously. I realized this morning that really, I still don't like this show. Sorry Line. I am, however, addicted to watching this train wreck every stinkin week. So help me. If there wasn't a Chris to look forward to, I don't know if I'd have come this far. What I like the most about watching the show is watching it with Autumn. And Line. We IM or text back and forth through the entire show. THAT is fun. That is what I look forward to. That and catching Paula drunk off her crunkin ass. Bitch was sipping Jack and cokes last night! (Quoting Line directly here) I do like Simon. He's real. The other two, not that real. It was funny to watch Randy Jackson squirm through each country song last night. I was squirming too. Yikes People! Here is what I don't like. Mostly, the contestants pick crappy songs, they sing nervously, they awkwardly walk the stage looking like they are going to tumble down that step. I build it up in my mind that I'm going to be entertained (blown away) by their performances and I'm just not. I need to approach this differently. I need to calm down about it. Because I'll be damned if I'm gonna waste another 10 minutes of my life trying to call in and vote for someone and get a busy signal. over and over and over again. I can't believe I just admitted that. I am now SHAMELESS. I feel like I'm in that dream where I'm naked at school...Only it's American Idol and I'm naked on stage and Simon is about to tear me to shreds. Ok, so I got all that off my chest. I've admitted the show sucks blah blah blah... Even still, I want Chris to win. I still like Katharine McPhee. I think either of these really are Idol material. Mandisa is really good. I don't think she has the heart of an american idol. Maybe a famous gospel singer though :D And for fun, gotta love the Pickler. She's just dang cute. Don't care what anyone else thinks on that. I'll watch this to the end. I'll finish what I start. I may watch more seasons. But I don't have to like it. You can't make me. hmmph posted by Autumn's Mom at 12:36 PM - 4 WTF!

THIS IS THE POST WHERE I TALK ABOUT SNOT I hope that doesn't turn you away. There is a lot of snot going on around here. Mr. Mucus showed up at the door the other day. I don't know who let him in, but he's back with a vengeance. I have been sick a lot this winter. I've decided I'm done. Unfortunately, the people I choose to spend my days with apparently are not done. There is sickness on either side of me today. Throat clearing, booger blowing, females with low manly voices sickness! I need some antiseptic wipes and I need them NOW. I keep imagining that feeling you get in the back of your throat and you think, "Am I getting sick???" and you swallow a lot?? You know what I mean. NO. Not gon do it. Not this time sister. I've got places to be, people to do. Don't have time for snot. Please excuse me while I go gargle with dial soap and wash my hands 50 times under scalding hot water. posted by Autumn's Mom at 9:48 AM - 3 WTF!

 

Tuesday, April 04, 2006

TO THE ALIENS WHO ABDUCTED KENNY ROGERS Bring him back you mother fuckers! This is Kenny This? NOT KENNY. He sings like Kenny. He sounds like Kenny. When he smiles I see a glimpse of Kenny. But DAMN. That ain't him. So bring him back. Seriously, we'll let you have Tom Cruise and his baby alien. I swear. posted by Autumn's Mom at 8:12 PM - 7 WTF!

Spring Anyone? Good morning. How are my little crackers today? I have a real post for later, I really just want to check in with you folks. I'm feeling a little melancholy today. I know it's the rain. It just keeps holding on. Will spring ever spring?? Maybe by Easter. So far today, my chatty Kathy at work here has called in sick. She makes the day go by so much faster :) I've had non fat yogurt with granola and cantaloupe for breakfast. (mmmm Liz, don't you want some??? hahaha) I'm trying to stay away from carbs in the morning. It's very very very hard. J, pass the cheetos! I've guzzled half a Dr. Pepper for energy. The only hint of sunshine this morning is the light hitting my aluminum can just right. *sigh* I leave you with a parenting tip. Don't watch Supernanny with your know-it-all 11 year old who will point out all the bad decisions you've ever made in their entire life! I hope my daughter has a daughter. My sweet revenge :D posted by Autumn's Mom at 9:25 AM - 4 WTF!

 

Monday, April 03, 2006

Good Attitude/Bad Attitude It's pouring. Me, "It's raining. I'll take you to the bus stop." SB (spoiled brat), "noooooooooo. I don't waaaaaaaaaaant you to take me to the bus stop." Me, "Tough it's raining. You can watch TV longer and I'll just take you to school??" SB, "Nooooooooooooooooooo!!" Me-loudly in my head, "Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck!!!" Me, "Scoop the cat litter and take it to the outside trash." She scoops and goes out to the trash. Comes back in and says, "ok. You can take me to school." Plops down on couch. I think from now on, every time she argues with me she's scooping cat shit! posted by Autumn's Mom at 8:14 AM - 8 WTF!

 

Saturday, April 01, 2006

Happy Fools Day "The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year." Mark Twain posted by Autumn's Mom at 12:18 PM - 2 WTF!